Saturday, January 9, 2010

Great. I have to buy an effing cat magazine?

Look, a story about "45 Amazing Library Cats" in the February 2010 edition of Cat Fancy.

No. Nobody is making me buy this, but if you're a regular reader, you know that I'm a collector of library animal stories. I love to read heartwarming tales of library cats and library anacondas and library squids.

In fact, in 1997, I stole a panther from the animal sanctuary and let is loose in the local library just so I could have a story to clip from the paper and add to my collection. The headline "Librarian Maimed by a Fucking Panther" is one of my favorites. The paper had to defend the language in the headline, with the editor saying, "There was a fucking panther in the library. What the fuck would you say?"

That's right. What would you say? But check that cover. Isn't that cat awesome? No, not the fluffy one, that freaky monster cat with the pointy ears. What the hell is that? A Peterbald? That's one seriously ugly cat. Oh, crap, do you think he can hear me?