Yes, there are lots of other fuck-ups you can cite, like organized religion and forms of government, but misspellings on semi-permanent messages is completely preventable, and hence, much more of a fuck-up.
Did you ever see a guy with something misspelled on his tattoo? How hard is it to check the dictionary before you ink up? Shouldn't every tattoo shop have at least one dictionary and a book of baby names for customers to reference? Or maybe the phone number of the local fucking library?
I admit, my tattoo is fucked up. When I designed it, I looked at in the mirror without adjusting my mind to how others would see it. And I also had my arm at an angle which contracted my shoulder muscles so that when I stand naturally, stretches and distorts the design. Oh, and the tattoo guy was drunk.
That's another major fuck-up. Make sure you don't visit the tattoo guy on a Sunday morning when he's been up until 7 a.m. drinking. There aren't going to be any straight lines that day.
Anyway, the one fuck-up that stands out because I've seen it twice is the word, "lose." So far, I've seen "Born to Loose" and a pair of dice showing "snake eyes" that says, "You Loose." Neither time did I feel stupid enough to point out the mistake to the bad-ass mofo with the scabs on his knuckles.
Which brings me to grave stones. I don't wander through cemeteries reading them; simple answer: vampires and zombies. And even just the dead trying to reenter this realm by possessing my body is enough to keep me away, you know, the usual stuff dead people try to do when you get naked in a cemetery at midnight because your friends Laura and Marci dare you.
But I took an online test a long time ago that told me how I would die (the link seems to be gone):
| You scored as Disappear. Your death will be by disappearing, probably a camping trip gone wrong or an evening hike you never returned from. Always remeber that one guy who was hiking alone and got in a rock slide. He could have died, but he cut his own hand off to save himself. Don't end up like him (or worse, dead).
How Will You Die?? created with QuizFarm.com |
But look at the typo: "...remeber that one guy..." Yeah, I remeber that guy because he sawed off his own hand.
But other than that, how else can you guarantee that people will remeber you? And that is that answer: put a typo on your grave stone:
"Remeber Me."
Sure, people will say you're an idiot, but you'll already be dead, so who cares. But people will pass your grave and comment eternally on your final message to the world.
But since I'm going to just disappear, I don't know if I'll even have a grave. There will be nothing to mark my passing when the aliens take me.
At least I have this blog.
What's cool now is that Blogger allows you to schedule posts for a future date or time. So since I don't know when I'm going to just up and disappear, I guess I'll have to post my final message to you all one month into the future.
Then every twenty days, or so, I can just move it up another month and then another, so that when I finally kick it, my message will appear for everyone to see. It'll be eerie. But it will be simple: remeber me. Oh, and I'll probably tell you my name.
