Monday, December 7, 2009

former Librarian presents Porn Star Karaoke

Seymour Satin, yes, that's his real name, is a former corporate librarian.
"As the porn stars schmooze, a 52-year-old former librarian who goes by the name Seymour Satin helps keep things under control from behind the curtain. Satin, the bar's owner, tells Captain Bob sharply, "We don't allow that in here" when he agrees to autograph a female fan's bare backside."
"We don't allow that in here," spoken like a true librarian.

Seymour's is the place to come where porn stars exercise their oral skills. Huh, get it? Come? Oral skills? Oh, I crack me up.
"In most cases it becomes clear within just a few off-key notes that these people are lucky they have sex films to fall back on."
No, the microphone doesn't go in your mouth. Just hold it about two inches from your lips, like you're shooting a scene for cable. That's better.

What's your plan for retirement? I thought I was going to beat up school kids for their anti-depressant medication then resell it online to make enough money to buy food. But now I'm rethinking that.