Wednesday, December 23, 2009

2009: the effing year in review.

So it looks like I'm still doing this. This blogging thing. Back in April, I published my second collection of effing librarian wisdom, METAL ASS, and swore that I would quit, that I'd said all that I had to say on pretty much any topic I could imagine. I gave away a couple of books and one smart-ass book winner put his copy up for sale at twice the retail price, $1,999.

And on May 1, 2009, I said goodbye. I quit. For reals.

I claimed I got a job writing a show for Fox called Love Shaft where each episode found two strangers trapped on an elevator, and we get to see just how long it takes for one to kill and eat the other. (Hey, I said it was on Fox.)

And I was even going to delete this blog. I exported all the posts to another blog as an archive, the effing library. But then I didn't delete it. I chickened out.

And little by little, I continued to post horrible, unfunny stuff that should amuse no one but me, but for some reason, continued to entertain the nine of you who keep returning.

And now I'm up to 115 posts since I quit. At this rate, by April, I'll need to publish another book that I will give to my friends who will smile nervously and promise to read it, but who will quietly slide it under the short leg of that wobbly table out on the patio and then tell me they dropped it in the toilet from laughing so hard while reading it. And I'll believe them. As I always do, never questioning why they were reading my book on the toilet, which is gross.

So anyway, that's been my 2009. It seemed to go by so fast.

Oh, and I may have gotten married and had some babies, but that's not important. (Just kidding. Maybe next year.)